Angry days…

We all have them. You know when you bite everyone’s head off for no apparent reason, get cranky at trivial little things, nothing feels like its going right etc. etc. Well I haven’t been quite that bad today because I’ve spent most of it at home on my own, but I think if I’d had a job to go to they might have put a ‘do not disturb’ sign up on my door. I get this way by something triggering a chain of thoughts that lead me back to the times I’ve felt like I’m about to fall into a deep dark hole.

There has been something chipping away at me recently that hadn’t really got to me the way it did today. Maybe yesterday when reality hit me at the climbing wall it was the beginning of the chain. Today I sat in my craft room & hand wrote in my journal – something I haven’t done in a long time because writing this blog has taken over. I mostly give you the ‘unedited’ me, in which, more often than not, I will drone on about anything & everything that goes on in my life. However, there are some things that need to be aired but not to the world. Some things are too personal & sometimes too painful to share, & most of it wouldn’t make sense unless I wrote a War & Peace sized explanation first.

After some therapeutic crafting & guitar practice I put my best foot forward & dealt with the madness of Tuesday field hockey. For a couple of hours I did my best to push all my anger aside & pretend life is good. Then, when all the kids were gone & mine were tucked up in bed I finally broke down & let out some of that anger. It’s nothing that anyone can fix, I just have to work through it myself – again – & hope that one day the anger will be put in a box along with it’s reason’s & stop messing with my head.

Technical bliss…

07.30 – We made it to choir on time – again!!

08.00 – Drop younger child in his classroom after doing his reading in the car.

08.15 – After chatting to his teacher (nothing to do with school just socializing) I head to my class parent AGM.

08.30 – Why do I go to all the meetings? Free coffee of course. I volunteer quite a lot at school because I can & it’s important to me that the boys see that I am willing to give up valuable crafting/shopping/social time for the benefit of others. It keeps me busy & my mind active, & of course there is a social side of it. Their school is very much a community & I can honestly say it has that feel about it. I don’t mind giving up time to keep be a part of that.

09.30 – Home to my girl who is grumpy that there has been no walk in the park this morning.

09.50 – The technician from our home security company arrives to fix the mess the first guy left 2 months ago. This guy is a senior techy & listens to me complaining about the first guy. He wants to let the owner of the company because the way the first guy behaved was highly unacceptable & needs to be taken further… oh dear!

10.30 – After changing beds & doing laundry I decide that it’s high time my personal inbox has a spring clean.

12.30 – The technician is having a nightmare fixing the problem but my inbox is gleaming with space. I have sent oodles of mail replying & cancelling & questioning & arranging…

13.00 – The tech is finally done! I have moved on to making teacher thank you cards…

13.45 – Off to the torture chamber…

14.00 – There is a new receptionist at physio who doesn’t know me – doesn’t she understand I practically pay her wages?

14.30 – I refused needles again because I’m bordering on phobia status but he just as mean to me as always.

14.45 – Quickly pop into the pharmacy on the way to school to pick up my Humira, my hair is admired by several – even the owner!

15.05 – School pickup. Remember younger son raided the recycling & took it to school for a project. Well you can imagine how thrilled I was when he proudly marched out of the classroom having made a TV out of it all – now I’ll never get rid of it!

15.40 – Elder child’s turn for hockey so I throw an omelette together for him while having ANOTHER discussion with younger child about the importance of eating his lunch at school. It is calling for drastic measures to prove a point – All Nerf guns have been confiscated until further notice.

08.00 – After guitar practice, spellings, making lunches, reading, baths, & feeding elder child again all is calm in world again… time to build Lego!

 

 

Hammered!

Oh I do love sunny Saturday mornings. You wake up at some ridiculous hour (when hubby disappears in head to toe lycra for a ride), the sun streaming in through the curtains, & you discover it’s only 6am! I can turn over & snooze for another couple of hours.

08.30 – Just me & the kids for breakfast. Elder child has a hockey game so we fed Boris (the imaginary tapeworm for anyone new reading) waffles, berries & maple syrup.

09.15 – I was just about to shower when a rather sweaty hubby returned. We quickly discussed a plan of action for the day & I left him to feed his own tapeworm.

11.00 – We decided that I’m not going to watch the hockey game. Today he was playing in goal & it was all the way over on the north shore. I had a mountain of laundry to do (& tomorrow is Mother’s day so there will be a strike), the dog needed a walk, & my body was craving a stretch out.

12.30 – I get a text from hubby, younger child took all his gear just in case they were short of a player & they were. I knew he would be absolutely made up by this even though he’d be playing with & against some kids 3-4 years older than him.

14.30 – By the time they all returned I’d done 3 loads of laundry, a pilates routine, walked the dog, watered the garden, made chocolate strawberries for dessert, hung the hammocks up outside & chilled out in the garden for half an hour reading my book! Younger child had thoroughly enjoyed playing a proper game & apparently did really well. Elder child let in 3 goals & declared he was a useless goalie & it was also boring!

15.30 – Hubby took him out on his road bike so he could let off some steam. Meanwhile, younger child had me (now Wonder Woman) up in their playhouse hammering nails into the wood so they could hang all their (plastic) Black & Decker tools up & make it into a workshop.

16.15 – I now need a glass of something pink & a lie down. The bikers return & of course are starving (yes I know this is hard to believe but true), so I fire up the barbi & open a bottle of rosé.

17.00 – Yells of distress from the garden, the hammock elder child was sat in has dumped him on the concrete. I know he’s a drama queen but I genuinely think he’s hurt himself this time. Tylenol & Advil for his dessert then.

17.15 – Everyone is full of ribs & chocolate strawberries, & we are basking on our sunny patio – I love, love, LOVE this weather!

18.00 – I help elder child finish his Mother’s day card – odd I know but I don’t trust him to use all my stuff on his own, & at least this way I get to have some say what I get.

20.00 – Tired boys are in bed, the dog is patrolling the fence & warning off falling leaves, hubby is reading in a hammock (interestingly not the one he just re-hung after the earlier drama), & we each have a glass of something pink.

 

CHEERS!!

 

 

 

Sunny Saturday stuff…

Yes, it’s another awesome day of blue skies & sunshine. So…

We potted, watered, cleaned up, set some backyard ground rules, then potted some more.

Field hockey games are always much more enjoyable when the weather also plays the game – & it was hot out there.

Now my lovely babysitter has arrived (BFF’s daughter) & we are off out for dinner with friends is this is it I’m afraid!

Happy Weekend…

Mid-life hair crisis!

07.30 – No minivan so we all pile into the Mini. After the usual choir drop off, younger child & I do the usual reading in the car, and then once I’d sent him up to his classroom I waited in the lobby for elder child so I could take him to his track meet.

08.15 – He finally appears as if we have all day to get there.

08.40 – We fight our way through the traffic out to the university grounds & of course they are doing construction on the road right in front of the field – it’s a total gong show! We find parking, which happens to be two cars back from the school van & we notice a slightly stressed looking teacher, that we know quite well, hauling tents & boxes & first aid kits etc. out of the van. She is also talking to a colleague on the phone about the cost of parking for the day & telling him not to move from the spot he’d secured next to the field. It’s turns out that hot teacher is sick & he coordinates these events for the kids so it had completely screwed up their schedule. I go to the machine to get the number so I can do pay by phone.

08.50 – We are both still trying to pay for parking. The app asks for time by minutes & she is going to be there for 8 hours. Neither of us has had enough coffee to do the math. My app is having a meltdown & I can’t pay at all. So I cut a deal with the teacher, I offer the services of elder child to help her carry the stuff if she wouldn’t mind me not walking to the field with him so I don’t have to pay. We are just about to part ways when it becomes apparent that there is no transport back to school, I will need to pick him up – as if having to drop him off wasn’t stressful enough to work out. I email younger child’s teacher asking her to him know he will need to go to after school care – I had left my Wonder Woman costume at home with going the salon today. I tell elder child I will be back for him as soon as I can but his last event is not until 2.30pm so it should be fine.

09.10 – A very quick stroll down a short stretch of the park so that the dog can do what she needs to do, then it’s off to the pet salon for a bath – this is the nearest I will ever get to a mother/daughter spa day.

09.30 – I leg it home to change out of runners & dog walking jacket & grab some water & snacks before I head off to my own salon for a complete transformation.

10.10 – After taking before pictures they begin toning my hair to get the red out & I feel like my head is on fire!

11.30 – I now have pale yellow brassy hair. They cut it a bit shorter & re-style it so it doesn’t look like a bob anymore, dry it & take pictures.

12.00 – Second stage of bleach out. Purple goop is pasted all over my head & it stinks.

13.00 – Once the purple goop is rinsed out they dry it again & take pictures again.

13.30 – Purple accents are added using foils & I then melt under the dryer for 10 minutes.

14.00 – Rinsed again, dried & styled so the back can be shaped & a cute little hair tattoo is carved into my neck.

14.30 – 4½ hours later I’m done & they take pictures of the awesome result… which I love… love… LOVE!!

14.50 – I suck up the $17 parking because really what’s an extra 17 bucks on top of what I’ve just forked out in the name of funky hair? It’s then straight out to UBC to pick up the athlete.

15.10 – Elder child has had a fun day & immediately gives me a ‘WOW MUM’. He loves the new look. Next stop the pet salon.

15.30 – The traffic is insane & thank god for after school care because poor younger child would have been left to god & good neighbours by now. We pick up my girl who is all fluffy & beautiful again smelling like roses. I put the window down for her & she sits waving her hair around in the breeze like something out of a Loreal advert… well she is worth it!

15.40 – Last stop, school. Younger child is never keen on leaving after school care & I still don’t get why. Maybe it’s a playing with your school friends but not actually in school properly thing. I eventually extract him & sign him out.

16.00 – Home! However, it will be short lived as elder child needs to do his homework, change into hockey strip & eat dinner in an hour.

17.20 – We’re on the move again, but only out for 5 minutes to the hockey field.

17.45 – Hubby’s returns home to a new wife & really likes her!!

20.00 – Tired busy boys in bed & I have a new look to celebrate… cheers!

Me & my marvellous Mini!

06.15 – YAY! Another rested sleep, waking up to sunshine & no choir practice today.

08.15 – A slightly chilly but beautiful walk in the park with some of the usual suspects.

09.15 – Driving home & the flat tire light comes on! Our minivan is already waaaay overdue for it’s service & we need them to also change over the winter tires, but a flat in a winter tire is an expensive add-on – not happy.

09.30 – Back at base I inform hubby of the good news. I have some errands to run that are not close to home & I wasn’t sure I would get everything in my Mini. Apparently I should trust my own words & never underestimate a Mini – especially a soft top because you can pack even more into that bad boy!

10.00 – Phone call from teacher mum, her son is off school with the dreaded virus so won’t be going to hockey. I feel terrible that I have passed it onto to the poor wee guy. This also changes our child swapping plan so I call hubby, leave a message, text him, call again – still no answer.

12.30 – It would appear that you can fit 8 cases of wine, 9 plants, 8 window boxes & me in a Cooper S with room to spare. I call hubby again – no answer…

13.30 – Bar chords practice is going very badly, I hope my teacher will be patient with me on Thursday, especially after I tell him that I have spent most the past week on my deathbed.

14.20 – Finally speak to hubby who has only just received my text – GRRRR! & none of my calls – double GRRRR! We rearrange our plan & now I’m late for a meeting…

14.35 – The mum I’m meeting to finalize our staff appreciation breakfast arrangements for Friday is also late!

14.50 – We spend 5 minutes arranging the final details & 15 minutes of gossiping!!

15.10 – Normal civilized pick up – or so I thought. Elder child already knew he wasn’t being picked up by teacher mum so he was waiting for me, ready to pounce & request food to feed Boris (that is what we have now named his tapeworm!). Younger child hasn’t eaten all of his so I just hand elder child the food bag & tell him to vacuum up whatever he wants from there. Younger child then gets the third degree on the way home for not eating his lunch – AGAIN!!

16.15 – The same routine before field hockey applied but was just easier with just one child. Hubby arrives home & I leave to pick up elder child from Track & Field practice.

16.40 – Elder child informs me on the way home that the track meet tomorrow does not have transport to the field – I have to take him & his first event is at 9am. He is supposed to be there 45 minutes before… I am officially Wonder Woman as I will need to be in 2 places at once! I completely lose it in the car because this is the first that this has been mentioned – also my fault for not reading the email in full too but that’s a separate rant altogether.

17.00 – I have been given half an hours grace because he discovers that his first event is not until 9.30. We make an agreement that from now on he needs to check with us before signing up for these events – especially if there is no transport… yeah right, & I will bump into Henry Cavill tomorrow while looking fabulous after having my hair done!

18.00 – Friends again we play our guitars together…

19.00 – Now that I’m feeling much better I really need a glass of wine!

 

 

It finally got me too!

06.15 – Someone has force fed me razor blades during the night & they are all stuck in my throat.

06.35 – A very worried hubby brings me Tylenol & leaves for work as I crawl out of bed. Choir starts in less then an hour.

07.30 – We make it to school, I don’t know how, but we do. Younger child & I sit in the parking lot while he does the reading he didn’t have time to do last night because of hockey.

07.50 – I drag my sorry self into school. We enter the lobby where the principal is promoting his retirement golf tournament by setting up a putting green outside the library. He is giving away house points for any child who can nail a hole in one (I learned later that elder child did in fact nail it). We fight our way through the crowd of budding Tiger Woods (not a great example for kids but I have no interest in golf because I’m still sexually active!) & make our way up to his floor. I deposit him in teacher mum’s classroom. She kindly offers to help out with dropping the kids off if I can’t get back to school. This would normally be great but elder child has a Dr’s appointment at 3.30.

08.00 – I quickly exit the building hopefully taking my virus with me.

08.15 – I make it home, call physio to cancel my afternoon appointment, remove the hat that was hiding very bad hair, take a glass of water to the sofa & crash.

09.15 – Knock on the door, I guess correctly that it is the lawn guys & make the decision not to answer as the dog is already in the house going bananas (this is why they knock for fear of my giant teddy bear of a dog licking them to death).

10.30 – I wake up & notice a text from hubby checking in on me about an hour earlier. After answering I take more Tylenol & decide to watch some tv & promptly fall asleep again half way through the episode.

12.00 – I risk eating a banana & a yoghurt because they are soft (I did consider blending them but actually couldn’t be bothered). I watch the end of the episode I slept through & the beginning of the next… falling asleep halfway that one.

14.00 – I check in with hubby hoping he can finish early to do the pick up otherwise I need to sort myself & that could take some time. Thankfully the outside world has been spared of my germs & my unkempt look.

15.00 – A quick concerned kiss from hubby as he drops his cycling bag & grabs the car keys.

16.00 – I am still festering on the sofa but manage to drag my sorry backside off it when everyone arrives home. I actually felt better for moving around but everything is achy.

17.30 – Hubby walks the dog with elder child to his field hockey practice, while younger child goes through the crate of next doors junk. He is excited to find a really cool 3D book on dinosaurs & 2 old soccer books. These were on the top, she very sneakily put a whole load of finance & stock exchange books underneath – surprisingly he was less impressed with these.

18.00 – I have been festering long enough so I go for a bath. Younger child is now making a paper computer for a school project.

19.00 – Elder child returns with his tapeworm having already had dinner before practice & his coach gave them all ice cream lollipops during practice. He has toast while reciting his debate speech for tomorrow & discussing how he should project his voice for the play on Friday morning – which I will go & see germs or no germs, just try & stop me!

20.00 – I think I might eat ice cream because I need something cold & comforting for my poor throat.

Another tiring Tuesday

08.00 – Another beautiful July day ahead of us – in the middle of April – LOVE IT! I even wore shorts to walk the dog.

09.15 – The upstairs of the house is like a sauna & there are melted cats all over the beds.

10.15 – Beds changed, a load of laundry in & time for a last attempt at rescuing the polo shirt that STILL has ‘washable’ paint on it from school. Rubber gloves up to my armpits & and industrial apron so I can scrub it with Clorox.

10.30 – Nothing is happening, the paint is still very visible so I pour some into a spray bottle & soak it. While stood at the sink I see that my neighbor is in so I leave the shirt to soak again & pop next door to deliver a wedding card I have made for her daughter. The dog comes too because she is good friends with their dog (their dog is male & probably the reason why my dog lifts her leg to pee!).

10.45 – I am still there receiving a blow-by-blow account of the work required in their basement post flood. She offers me coffee but I decline suddenly remembering the shirt that has probably now got a large hole bleached into it.

10.55 – I finally rescue the shirt only to find that the paint has still not budged. I place in the machine anyway with a bunch of other school shirts that are (supposed to be) white. Place more Clorox in the dispenser & set it on a super power wash that takes over 2 hours.

11.15 – I set to & clean all the BBQ grills. This should become an Olympic sport; I did a month’s worth of workouts by scrubbing those things.

13.00 – Guitar practice because it means sitting down & my knee is sore, & I knew if I sat in a normal seat I would fall asleep.

13.45 – The washer is finished & the moment of truth… They should make nail varnish out of that paint because nothing will destroy it! I declare the shirt a lost cause only to worn in an emergency. All the other shirts are pristine of course so at least it worked on something. I then put the washer through a clean cycle because I hate bleach & it’s always been very unkind to me or anything of mine it comes into contact with.

13.55 – It is baking on the patio & all our furniture is still buried under a tarp with a large roof box on top (hubby forgot that he’d put it there when we renovated & now doesn’t know where it is going to go – so it’s still sat there!). I managed to rescue a lounger to grab a short burst of vitamin D before school pickup & the madness of field hockey.

14.30 – I wake up suddenly when the dog barks at my neighbour who is coming over to offload some of her junk onto my kids! Looking at the time I suddenly remember I was supposed to leave early to pick up a new mouth guard (the store is in completely the opposite direction to school). After hauling the dog in & I was out the door within 5 minutes – still wearing BBQ scrubbing shorts etc. but no time to change – I successfully make it to the store & back to school just as the kids come out.

16.30 – We are getting ready to leave the house to go back to school after homework, dinner, changing into hockey gear & a Nerf gun fight, when teacher mum’s son discovers he doesn’t have his runners. I text her as we leave because he will have some at school he can use. We get in the car & my younger child doesn’t have his water bottle. So, back into the house, grab the water bottle – we are now 10 minutes late in leaving.

17.45 – What can be less than a 10 minute ride is taking twice as long because there are other people on the road getting in my way!

17.55 – We screech into the parking lot under school to ‘We will rock you’ where they are waiting for us. The boys get out & the other two get in, teacher mum’s daughter is beside herself to finally have a ride in a convertible & thinks it’s really cool to wave to her mum by just sticking her arm up in the air!

19.15 – By the time the hockey players arrive home, we have had dinner, sorted out the laundry & started making Mother’s day card’s – it is so nice to have girl in my craft room, they listen to instructions & are excited about matching cardstock & ink.

20.30 – I have given into the great god of wine & accepted a glass – but just the one ok.

Whirlwind Wednesday…

06.30 – As predicted the little guy is quite sick, so now that’s two down.

07.20 – Off to school because elder child has choir. I take the dog with me so she can have a good run in the park.

08.45 – I return to the sanatorium to find the 2 of them lying at each end of the sofa sharing a blanket. I play nurse, although the cat seems to have it all under control (she thinks that lying very close to your head when your sick will help in some way).

09.20 – I do some laundry, some pilates, & finish the wedding card I’m making, in between playing nurse. I answer a call from the hospital reminding me that I have an appointment tomorrow for a joint injection in my knee – not sure why they thought I would forget about this as they only booked it yesterday! Twenty minutes later I get another call from the hospital wanting to arrange an appointment for my joint injection – I swear it was the same woman – she was very put out when I informed her that I have one for tomorrow. She then put me on hold while she checked this, presumably in case I was completely imagining this & the phone call she had made to me earlier. Yes, I was right, she was happy I was telling the truth!

12.00 – I get ready to go back to school & receive an email from the head honcho informing me that she had taken delivery of large donation from a parent who supplies toy stores & she had sorted everything into categories. I am then desperate to get to school asap, beside myself that she will have completely &#%$ed up my system!

12.35 – I arrive at school to find her organizing some prize baskets for a separate stall & she informs me that she didn’t add the donated prizes to my system because she didn’t want to &#%$ it up – PHEW! All is right in the world again.

13.00 – I am knee deep in stuffies when the mum who looked after my table yesterday arrives to help me sort. We get to work counting the prizes & stuffies, then box them up & label them.

Various people are in & out chatting because the room we are using is where the photocopier is – it was all very sociable.

15.10 – The other mum has to leave & I pop up to the lower school to hand over a drink & snack to older child because he’s involved in an iPad workshop until 4.30pm. I happen upon him the minute I walked into the lobby, he apparently was about to call me & declare imminent death by starvation because he had eaten all his food & would be going straight to field hockey after school – honestly, total drama queen!

15.30 – Off to the dollar store again for some supplies we have run out of – rubber bands, clear gift bags etc. I am wilting so I duck into a coffee shop & order a gigantic latte to go.

16.00 – Back at school I’m on a mission. I am determined that when I leave at 4.30pm I will be done, finished, complete! Then… I find a note from the head honcho – she’s rearranged some of the balloon prizes by taking some more out of my general prize boxes – NOOOOOOOO!!!!

16.30 – Mission accomplished. I pick up elder child to find that snacks were provided at the workshop so had been no need for the amateur dramatics – he still ate my snack too of course.

16.50 – Home to change into hockey gear & back out to drop him off.

17.35 – Back at the sanatorium it is clear that the little guy will have to be off school tomorrow. Hubby is already off so he can take me to the hospital, but we can’t take a sick child with us & I really don’t think it’s fair for him to see them sticking needles in mum’s knee. I see that my neighbor is in (they are like surrogate grandparents to our boys), so I pop over to ask if there is anyway they could help out. The answer is yes – great!

18.40 – I have to go back out to pick up from hockey.

19.30 – I am in my pj’s, under my blanket fort eating chocolate & colouring!

High Temp Tuesday!

06.15 – Zombie!

Hubby is properly sick so I saw every hour on the clock & younger child was up in the night with a bad dream.

07.35 – Boot camp leaves the house on time!

07.50 – The boys go one way to their classrooms & I go the other in search of an orange dragon.

08.30 – Another productive morning of donations, the orange dragon was a big hit, then a meeting with the head honcho. We figure out how the kids will pick their prizes & how we will organize them on the day. I declare that during my time on the donation table no parent wants any of the toxic critters near their house EVER! So, if we make them balloon prizes nobody will buy a balloon (this is a separate stall to mine). I should have kept my mouth shut because the critters are now prizes on my stall so at least 3 parents in the school are now going to hate me forever!

09.15 – I check in with hubby to make sure he’s still alive & find out if he needs to see a doctor. He thinks not because he’s a stubborn doctor himself. He decides to wait a bit longer. I stay at school to box up the prizes.

11.00 – Home via the dollar store to pick up some supplies to bag up small prizes, & some coloured beads for the kids to pick out their prizes.

11.30 – I drag hubby off his deathbed to get some fresh air & walk the dog with me.

12.45 – Back at school sorting prizes – AGAIN!

14.45 – I meet with another mum who has volunteered to run the donation table because of course its hockey on a Tuesday.

15.10 – I scoop up younger child & teacher mum’s son. The drill is the same as last week – home, change into hockey gear, homework, eat, out again.

16.45 – Back at school to meet teacher mum & swap the kids over.

17.10 – Back home with elder child & his classmate (teacher mum’s elder child). While dinner is cooking I am punching holes in tickets & adding rubber bands so the kids can wear them around their wrists for when they get stamped at each station/activity. The deal is when they have a full card of 10 stamps they come to my prize table & pick out a prize.

17.45 – Call from teacher mum – younger child’s mouth guard is not in its case or his hockey stick bag so technically he shouldn’t play. She passes me over to the coach (who is a friend of ours) & I agree he can risk of playing without it.

18.15 – After dinner I continue with the tickets & rope hubby into helping – suddenly he’s dying again! The rain starts…

18.45 – It is bouncing down & hubby is glad he’s sick & not stood on the sideline.

19.15 – Teacher mum arrives with the two boys, both are shivering & soaked through, & she is not much drier.

19.45 – Younger child has had a warm bath & is wrapped up in his bed still shivering. Hubby checks his temperature & discovers he’s about to burst into flames – GREAT! I don’t have time this week for sick kids!!

20.15 – Wine!!